Adults Story Typing

Dating women has always been a hobby of mine. The sweet sensation of a passionate kiss on the lips just jangles my jollies if you know what I mean. The embrace of a naked woman, her bare goodies pressing against my buff chest in the candle light. It's an outstanding experience that is unmatchable. Or so I thought. However, dating women doesn't even compare to taking a nice, juicy, poop. Taking poops is another one of my hobbies (isn't it a hobby for everyone)? The best sensation is when you have had to take a poop for a very long time, and then you rush into your house after a twenty minute drive, almost feeling like it can seep out of your crevice into your pants. You rush into the bathroom, not even bothering to close the door, lunge at the toilet, and success! You plop that platter down! The succulent smell inflates the room like a balloon, engulfing all that cross it's path. That is why I like to keep my tooth brush in the cabinet. The worst experience with that hobby though, is when you are constipated. The blood oozing out of the veins from your crevice is unmatched by any painful experience known to mankind. Even slicing off your own jewels with a Krol Blade from the World of Warcraft doesn't compare to the pain of a bloody crap. There isn't even a juicy, tasteful stench to go with a bloody session of toiletry. Just pain, moaning, and sweat. It is kind of funny however to look down and see the smeared red on that tablet of brown. Oh how it makes me giggle! See, dating women and taking craps are a lot a like. Sometimes you get those good ones, with great qualities all around that leave you feeling refreshed and like a new man. And then you get the bloody shits, the psycho bitches, the ones that make you want to commit suicide after you are down. But then that's what flushing is for. To get rid of the bloody shits and retarded women. But then, if you only use flushing to get rid of bloody shits, what do you do with the awesome shits? Well it's simple, I save it in a jar and dump it on the women I'm dating while they are in bed with me! I don't think I'll be dating women anymore.